Anatomy of a Dark Side Disciple

I mentioned a few weeks ago after listening to the Tales of The Jedi and Dark Lords of The Sith audiobooks that the reasons that people (actually, they’re overwhelmingly men, with the exception of Aleema Keto and Asajj Ventress) turn to the Dark Side seem very flimsy. These stories are mostly based on comic books, so the lack of depth isn’t that much of a shock, but, still.

It’s really easy to spot someone who’s going to end up on the Dark Side -- they’re consistently arrogant. That’s why they always look shocked when they get killed.

Exar Kun: Started out as a Jedi historian, of all things. Threatened his master during a sparring session. Got pissed when his master told him to stop researching Sith lore because he was too immature to handle it. Quit his apprenticeship and went to a planet where worshipers of the dead Sith Lord Freedon Nad were acting up. Made contact with the dead Sith who led him into a trap and crushed every bone in his body. Rather than accept death, he chose the Dark Side. After this he went on to kill a lot of people.

Satal and Aleema Keto: Spoiled aristocrat cousins. They seem to have never had any morals to begin with, so this may be the rare case where you have people who were just born bad. These two didn’t like being chaperoned or told what to do by parents and family so they stole Sith artifacts from a museum, mastered the techniques, killed the relatives who were pissing them off, and became despots.

Ulic Qel-Droma: Headstrong, impulsive young Jedi. Poor diplomat, superior swordsman. Decided to infiltrate the Sith organization led by the Keto cousins even though every single person he knew told him it was a really fucking bad idea. But what do they know anyway, huh? He was poisoned by Sith shrapnel in a battle, got seduced by Aleema Keto, then decided, what the hell -- I’ll join you guys for real. He killed Satal, became Exar Kun’s apprentice, killed his own brother, then eventually repented after countless deaths.

While we’re at it, let’s look at some other Dark Siders and their motivations.

Darth Maul: He was raised in brutal fashion by Darth Sidious, so he seems to never have been exposed to the Light Side. In his one line in The Phantom Menace he sounds genuinely committed to the Sith having their “revenge” on the Jedi for God knows what offense. He displayed arrogance when fighting Obi-Wan and taunted the padawan with his lightsaber instead of finishing him off -- that’s why he lost a duel that he’d already won.

Count Dooku: I think he honestly believed that the Republic was morally bankrupt and it needed to be broken up. Of course, the fact that other people didn’t feel that way didn’t mean shit to him. Dooku didn’t feel that people have a right to choose the government they want. In his mind, he and the Sith would do a better job of running shit and he didn’t care how many people got killed in the process of “cleaning up corruption.” And he definitely thought he was the best fencer in creation.

Anakin Skywalker: Arrogant. Afraid of losing loved ones. Easily offended. Impatient. Also very gullible. He was raised as a slave, so the idea of the strong being meant to control the weak was firmly ingrained in him.

Asajj Ventress: In it for revenge. Blamed the Republic and the Jedi for her issues and the death of her mentor. She was very proud of her skills.

Darth Sidious: He talks about wanting to establish order, but who knows what he really wants, other than the elimination of the Jedi? Nothing about his true background and motivation is known.

So, this is the blueprint for a Dark Side disciple:

• Male, usually teen to mid-twenties, usually human.


• Tutored by a respected Jedi Master who is technically skilled, but emotionally distant.


• More physically gifted than his peers, but displays less wisdom.


• Few or no friends.


• May be an orphan.


• Wants to be acknowledged as the best.


• Craves order, yet consistently disobeys others’ orders.


• Victim of childhood physical or emotional abuse.


• Masks fear with anger.


• Displays naiveté and narrow-mindedness.

Interestingly enough, Luke almost perfectly fits the profile except for three things:

• There’s no evidence of him being physically or emotionally abused as a child.


• Luke never shows any interest in power.


• Luke doesn't think he's the greatest thing in the universe.

Is it that simple?

You can have shoddy Jedi training, you can grow up unpopular, you can be gullible and impulsive, but as long as you were raised in a decent home, have no interest in controlling other people and have a realistic view of your abilities, the Dark Side won’t have anything to offer you?

Well, yeah. It seems so.