Shanghai Bootleg

Jeremy from Shanghai picked up a bootleg Revenge of The Sith DVD and discovered that the dialogue had been translated from English to Chinese back to English, with results that are too ridiculous for words. It's kinda Yoda, kinda Jar-Jar.

Some examples:

Right off the bat, the names are wack:

Anakin: "Gold," "Great hopeless situation warrior"
Obi-Wan: "Ratio the tile"
The Emperor: "West Leader"
The Jedi: "The hopeless situation elder," "The Presbyterian Church"

[Note: I don't think that calling the Emperor "West Leader" and the Jedi the "Presbyterian Church" was an innocent mistranslation, do you?]

=== Scene in Padme's penthouse ===

Padme: "Annie, I want to have our baby back home on Naboo. We could go to the lake country where no one would know. Where we would be safe. I could go early and fix up the baby's room. I know the perfect spot, right by the gardens."

Chinese to English translation: "I living the child's time you must at home. Make the home a little bit more safe. I can breakfast for the new house that baby tidy up it. It has a great father. A great hopeless situation warrior."

Anakin: "You are so beautiful!"
("The beauty that you are like this")

Padme: "It's only because i'm so in love."
("I let me become the beauty to your love.")

Anakin: "No, it's because i'm so in love with you."
("Not, I love you love deeper.")

Padme: "So love has blinded you?"
("Your meaning is a love to tie up you.")

Anakin: "That's not exactly what i meant."
("That is not my meaning.")

Padme: "That's probably true."
("At least I say to half.")

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Made by the church?? Is that like when you're "made" by the Mafia?