Foreign Films

I swiped this idea, with some modifications, from jali's house. Below are some foreign films worth seeing. They aren't ranked in order of preference, or any particular order.

Rabbit-Proof Fence: An Australian film about some half-aborigine children who escape from an orphanage and go on an impossibly long trek to reunite with their family. Very sad.

Lagaan: An Indian film about a group of villagers who respond to a British wager and form a rag-tag cricket team. If they win the match, their villages will avoid the crushing British taxes for three years. If they lose, they'll have to pay three times as much. The film runs about four hours, so be prepared.

Dirty Pretty Things: Murder complicates the lives of illegal immigrants struggling to survive in London. Very sympathetic characters.

The "Up" Series: Starting in 1964 with Seven Up, British director Michael Apted began what has to be the longest-running reality series. A group of seven-year-old children were filmed and interviewed and every seven years a new film is released showing how they're doing. In the most recent movie, the "kids" are now 49-years-old.

Most of them turned out about the way you'd expect -- the wealthy kids with the benefits of good schooling ended up with good careers. The biracial kid whose mom put him in a boys home for a year when he was seven (because it was embarrassing back then for a white girl to have a black kid) ended up working factory jobs and running a forklift. There were some surprises, such as how badly all of the girls ended up emotionally regardless of economic background. And one guy from a solid middle-class background dropped out of university and began a long downward spiral into homelessness before being rescued by another subject who was the son of a missionary.

Once Were Warriors: A drunken, out of work, violent father. Two sons in gangs. A battered wife and her young daughter try to hold the family together. Sounds like any of a number of inner-city American movies, but this one takes place in New Zealand. Stars Temuera Morrison, long before his role as Jango Fett in Star Wars: Episode II.

Kama Sutra: A Tale of Love: Nope, not a porn movie. Actually, pretty damn depressing. A wealthy woman and her servant, whom she treats like shit, grow up together, grow apart, and have really bad luck with men. Stars Naveen Andrews (Sayid from Lost) as a mean asshole.

"Mail" The Force Be With You

The U.S. Postal Services is helping celebrate the 30th anniversary of Star Wars by unveiling R2D2 mailboxes.

They're so darn cute! People are gonna deface them or steal them. You know this.

Read more...

Free Coffee

Find a store near you

Drive: The Next Big Thing

Yo, I may regret saying this, but I'm getting a vibe about this upcoming new show called Drive that's going to drop on Fox on April 15-16. I think this could be the next Prison Break.

Here's the teaser from the official site:

The next time you’re cut off by crazed drivers on your way to work, give them a little slack. They could be racing for their lives.

DRIVE is an action-fueled drama following a diverse group of Americans competing for their lives (or the lives of their loved ones) in an illegal, underground cross-country road race. Some of them have been coerced into joining “The Race”; others have sought out The Race themselves, hearing rumors of the $32-million prize. Each has a reason to compete. And each must win.

This could be the shit. Or it could be Cannonball Run. Or that cartoon with Muttley in it.

Learn more...

The Return of Sammy?

Texas Rangers' Sammy Sosa follows through on a single to center in the third inning off a pitch from Chicago White Sox' Gavin Floyd during a spring training baseball game in Surprise, Ariz., Tuesday, March 13, 2007.

Sosa says he feels like a rookie again after a season away from the diamond. Sosa had two hits and two runs on three at-bats with an RBI in the 12-8 loss to the White Sox. (AP Photo/Tony Gutierrez)

First Podcast. Not.

Nope, I'm not anywhere near close to doing my first podcast. I assembled all of my gear and I wasn't getting any response from the mic. That was so irritating. I didn't want to pack all this stuff up and send it back, so at 4 p.m. I dashed off to the nearest music store (Guitar Center) and had a chat with a salesman. He couldn't really diagnose the problem, but I ended up buying yet another piece of gear ( a mobile pre-amp), and when I got home, that worked.

So, I really might have to ship the mixer back. which I really don't want to do, 'cause that's gonna be a big hassle. I don't want to ship back the mic, 'cause the mic is fine, but it was part of the package deal.

I've been messing around for the last two hours using GarageBand and figuring out recording levels. At first there was an unacceptable amount of background hiss, but I think part of that is coming from the wireless router!

I couldn't understand why I was only hearing vocals through one ear until it dawned on me that to record in stereo, I would need two mics. :) I also accidentally discovered some filters that made my voice sound like a robot. I thought I would need some expensive program to do that when all along I already had it for free on my Mac. Cool.

UPDATE: I'm glad to say I've got the Alesis mixer working. Whew. I have no idea what to do with most of the buttons and knobs, however. I now realize that I probably could've gotten along with something with fewer inputs, but this was the one the podcast books recommended. Hmph.

Got my gear!

My Podcast Starter Kit gear arrived on Wednesday!

It consists of:

• An Audio-Technica AT2020 condenser mic
• An Alesis MultiMix8 USB mixer
• An Atlas DS7 desk mic stand, ProCo 5 ft. mic cable, and a USB cable
• Podcast Solutions: The Complete Guide to Podcasting
• I also picked up a pop filter and a disk of broadcast sound effects.

Now I need to test this stuff to make sure it's working...

There was a good article about authors who are podcasting their work in the NY Times on March 1. I like Scott Sigler's work. Lots of amusing profanity and over the top characters. I'm currently listening to The Rookie and I enjoyed Earthcore, Ancestor and Infection.

Several times a week Mr. Sigler, 37, steps into a walk-in closet in his San Francisco home. He reads into a microphone that connects to his computer via a sound mixer. Hanging shirts envelop him, masking ambient sound.

After being snubbed by publishers for years, Mr. Sigler began recording his first book, “EarthCore,” in 2005. He offered it as a podcast in 22 episodes (roughly 45 minutes each) that he posted online and sent free to subscribers for downloading. Before long, Mr. Sigler had 5,000 listeners; by the time he finished releasing his second novel, “Ancestor,” last January, he had 30,000, as he does for “The Rookie,” which is playing now.

With initial printings of novelists’ first books running as low as 2,000 copies, Mr. Sigler has a substantial audience, enough finally to attract a small Canadian publisher, Dragon Moon Press, which published “EarthCore” in 2005 and will release “Ancestor” on April 1.

Mr. Sigler also recently signed with a New York agent, Byrd Leavell of the Waxman Agency, who expects to park his latest, “Infection,” with a major publisher.

Others have turned to the Internet to build their audience, including Cory Doctorow, who offered the text of “Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom” as a free download in 2003. But Mr. Sigler is among the vanguard of authors stapling their literary aspirations to the iPod.

“A lot of no-name authors like me are getting massive grass-roots exposure, and some of us are going to percolate to the top and get on the best-seller list,” Mr. Sigler said.

His site has links to his podcasts.

March Forward

Well, as everyone is by now aware, we're setting the clocks forward three weeks early this year. This is supposedly supposed to save us energy, but I wonder how much money was spent by the companies that had to create and install software patches to cope with the change in the Daylight Savings time date?

Duh.

I'm pretty sure my computers will handle the change without a hiccup, but it looks like I need a patch for my Palm Zire PDA. I may need them for my cellphone and my older TiVo too.

What a pain in the ass!

Babylon 5: Lost Tales

Looks like Babylon 5 is returning to the screen. Cool! That was a kick-ass show. I got into it late. Many people told me how good it was, but every time I watched it, I invariably caught the worst show of the season. Then they started running it on TNT (or was it TBS?) five nights a week and I finally "got it."

Article about the production of the show here. They used to use Amigas to do the effects! Amazing.

Saucy Email Exchanges Revealed In Astronaut Case

From Access Hollywood:

ORLANDO, Fla. (March 6, 2007) -- Astronaut Bill Oefelein was in orbit aboard the space shuttle in December when he was sent a steamy e-mail from a girlfriend awaiting his return: "First urge will be to rip your clothes off, throw you on the ground and love the hell out of you."

Fellow astronaut Lisa Nowak apparently discovered that e-mail -- and some other romantic messages to Oefelein -- before she set off on her bizarre, 900-mile road-trip to confront her rival for Oefelein's affections.

Click here to view the e-mails.

Read more...

Lewis "Scooter" Libby - Wiki Style

LOL!

Gotta love Wikipedia. They've cleaned up his entry already, of course.

Image swiped from Wonkette's blog.

Vazquez Gets $34.5 Million, 3-year Extension From White Sox

From Excite:

TUCSON, Ariz. (AP) -Pitcher Javier Vazquez and the Chicago White Sox agreed Tuesday to a $34.5 million, three-year contract extension through 2010.

Vazquez will get $12.5 million this season, the final year of his current contract, and $11.5 million in each of the following three seasons.

The right-hander, who went 11-12 with a 4.84 ERA with the White Sox a year ago, is 100-105 overall in 10 major league seasons. He pitched three innings Tuesday against Colorado, giving up four runs and six hits.

Big waste of money, if you ask me. His record clearly shows he's a .500 pitcher, averaging 10 wins, 10 losses. He started the year well for the Yanks in that year I'd like to forget (2004), but he tanked in the second half.

Er, wasn't he the one who gave up that bomb to Johnny Damon in the 7th game of the ALCS?

Read more...

Man wanted for trying to revive father's corpse

From Reuters.com:

KARACHI (Reuters) - Pakistani police are hunting a man who dug up his father's two-year old corpse and took it home in a hijacked ambulance to try to bring him back to life.

We used to do this all the time in D&D. What's the big deal?

Read more...

Demande D'Informations

Vous vous appelez comment?
Quel est votre nom?
Quelle est votre profession?

[My job has me in an eight-week French class. I'm doing my homework for tomorrow's class. I don't like this book. This is some kind of total immersion class, so nothing is translated. This is not helpful, in my opinion.]

Un informaticien vietnamien
Une standardiste espagnole...

Return to Star Wars Galaxies

About a week ago I got an email from my good friends at Sony Online. It seems they want me back in the online game Star Wars Galaxies.

I quit the game about a year ago, but in truth I hadn't played for a good six months or more before that. I really loved that game when I first started. I've always sucked at video games, but this was the perfect game for me. It was structured in such a way that you didn't need to be "twitchy" to enjoy it. It wasn't all about having a fast trigger finger and looting corpses. There was many a night in which I never fired a weapon. Instead I often spent hours surveying the land for raw materials, setting up harvesters, crafting clothes, food and medicines and selling my wares in the public bazaar. I really enjoyed that.

Sometimes I just liked to go sightseeing. You got badges for visiting famous sites, so I visited Ben Kenobi's house, the Lars homestead, the escape pod of R2 and 3PO, etc.

And when I did feel like fighting, that was fun too. One of my favorite spots was a place nicknamed Creature Village, located on a Corellian moon. I would go out there either solo or with a few buds and we'd take up sniper positions and tag the giant sludge panthers that roamed the abandoned city's streets. On a good night you could quickly level up in marksmanship, medical and brawling skills.

Ah, the good old days.

Then they fucked it up.

They decided to change the combat system. Why? I don't know. Suddenly, creatures I could kill solo a week before -- like a bantha -- were kicking my ass. My armor no longer offered the same protection. I was forced to drop some skills. And so on. People started grumbling, then people started leaving. My friends dropped off one by one.Sony tried to appease people by making it easier to be a Jedi, but that unbalanced the game. Not to mention that in a game set in the Imperial era, it made to freaking sense to have Jedi and padawans openly chilling in cantinas or chopping people down in the street.

I eventually quit, really for economic reasons, both in the game and out. $16 a month wasn't really a lot, but it certainly could be used elsewhere, especially since months would go by without me logging on. In the game, the economy was haywire. I couldn't make a living selling clothes, weapons and armor anymore through the bazaar and finding a place to set up a store was tough. Withing the first two months of the game coming online, the main cities were ringed with a perimeter of fancy player-built malls. Since I was primarily a street vendor, I was shut out. I thought about cutting a deal with some guys to put up a vending machine in their mall, but I couldn't deal with the politics of joining a guild. Let me tell you, I learned more about economics through SWG than I ever did in any class.

So, now Sony wants me back. When I quit they said that my characters would be deleted after 90 days, but they lied. The characters are still there. They're offering me 21 days free. What the hell -- I'll do it. I always regretted not taking more screen captures of the nice scenery, so at the very least, I'll do that.

I wonder if my house on Dantooine is still there or if it fell into disrepair and was condemned?

We'll see.

BTW, I hate to admit it, but I'm psyched about the Lord of The Rings Online game debuting in April. Yes, I'm sure I'll regret that one too.

I will podcast... Soon!

Okay, I'm off to a bad start with regards to blogging every day this month, but this bullshit post counts anyway. So there.

As if I actually have time on my hands, I've decided that I'm gonna start a podcast. I went to a podcasting seminar that was a total joke last Saturday, so I figure if these people can do it, why not me?

I'm purchasing this starter kit from BSW Audio recommended by the Podcast Gear Guy's blog.

Soon you will all hear my lovely, strangely accented voice.

Be afraid, be very afraid...

Back on the blogging track

I've really fallen off on blogging. I let things slide so much I didn't post any New Year's predictions in January or celebrate my blog anniversary or my birthday in February.

I'm making a promise to myself to blog every day this month. We'll see how it goes.

Orlando: Good-bye, Cousin!

Today mommy took me to the airport. My cousin Marlene had to go back to Panama. She came in December to stay with us during her school vacation.

I am very sad. We played games every day and she tried to teach mommy to sing nursery rhymes in Spanish. I hope she comes back this Christmas.

The Wrong Stuff

From Military.com:

ORLANDO, Florida - An American astronaut accused of trying to kidnap a romantic rival for a space shuttle pilot's affections will remain in jail because authorities planned to charge her with attempted first-degree murder.

Orange County jail spokesman Allen Moore said Orlando police were in the process of adding the more serious charge that Navy Capt. Lisa Marie Nowak, 43, tried to kill Colleen Shipman, who she believed was romantically involved with fellow astronaut, Navy Cmdr. William Oefelein.

[snip]

Nowak drove 900 miles (1,500 kilometers) from her home in Houston to Orlando International Airport, donned a disguise and was armed with a BB gun and pepper spray when she confronted Shipman, police said. During the drive, she wore diapers - as astronauts do during launch and re-entry - so she would not have to stop to go to the bathroom.

[snip]

Nowak raced from Houston to Orlando. Dressed in a wig and a trench coat, she waited for Shipman's plane to land and then boarded the same airport shuttle bus Shipman took to get to her car, police said. Shipman told police she noticed someone following her, hurried inside the car and locked the doors, according to the arrest affidavit.

Nowak rapped on the window, tried to open the car door and asked for a ride. Shipman refused but rolled down the car window a few inches when Nowak started crying. Nowak then sprayed a chemical into Shipman's car, the affidavit said. Shipman drove to the parking lot booth and police were called.

An officer reported following Nowak and watching her throw away a bag containing the wig and BB gun. Police also found a steel mallet, a 4-inch (10-centimeter) folding knife, rubber tubing, $600 and garbage bags inside a bag Nowak was carrying when she was arrested, authorities said.

I love this story. OMG, this woman is CRAZY! This is an educated woman and she's reduced herself to a Jerry Springer Show trailer park stereotype. Unbelieveable.

What was she going to do with the rubber tubing and garbage bags? Suck out the other woman's blood? Gas her? Creepy.

Read more...

Are you ready for Vista?

Are you psyched?

Tonight at midnight stores across America are staying open late (or maybe they’re open early, whatever) to celebrate the debut of the new Windows operating system, Vista.

Microsoft was giving away Release Candidate 1 late last year, so, curious, I spent $5 to get a DVD copy. I could’ve downloaded it for free, but I didn’t have the patience. I’ve been playing around with Vista for about a month and a half on a spare computer with a clean installation.

My first impression was that it was pretty. Much of that has to do with the fact that they supply you with a nice set of wallpaper to choose from. There’s nothing like a beautiful Ansel Adams-type landscape to skew your perceptions. The icons are a little bigger. Like a Mac, you now have built in desktop gadgets. Also like a Mac when your cursor hovers over the icon for an open program in the task bar, your get a thumbnail preview. Oh, and you don’t have to buy a third-party application to burn a DVD. That’s finally built in so you don’t have to spend $80 on Roxio or Nero products. Well, duh. Took ‘em long enough.

Other than the prettiness, there is absolutely no reason to upgrade from XP. It’s not faster. If you’ve been getting by happily on a PC you bought in 2002 with 1 GB of RAM or less, you’re fucked now. If you really, really want this operating system, you need 2 GB of RAM and a 2 GHz processor, minimum. It’s not more stable. Yeah, I know I’m using RC1 and not the final version, but let’s face it – they’re giving away RC1 to tempt people to buy the real deal, right? This shit bombs big time. I haven’t seen crashes like this since Windows ME, and you know how bad that was. Sometimes it crashes on boot up for no reason. I’m on the other side of the room, nowhere near the keyboard and POOF! The system crashes and I have to do a hard restart. It was pretty consistently hanging after the screen saver came on, so I had to disable that.

Vista doesn’t like FireFox. There are no drivers for the HP printer I bought last March. The Sudoku game I bought three weeks ago doesn’t work. It says I don’t have a valid copy of Microsoft Office 2003 and I do, thank you very much. No surprises there. No way am I going to pay to upgrade to Office 2007. The bullshit invalidation of my Office 2003 made me go download the Open Office suite. Guess what? I like it. And it’s free. Guess who’s scrapped any notion of upgrading to Office 2007?

Vista gives you a hassle like the worst micromanager on Earth when you want to install something. Are you sure you want to install that? Do you know what that is? Do you trust the source? It views any installation – say, Adobe Acrobat Reader – as a potential security threat and it overreacts like ED-209 in RoboCop. Thankfully, it doesn’t shoot you.

I must say that I am excited about Vista, in a matter of speaking. I’m interested in the ripple effect and how the market is going to respond. I can’t wait to see all the bugs that are going to come to light. I just wish I could get in on the monetary action. A whole lot of people are going to make a whole lot of money this year retraining people and selling hardware upgrades, or trying to woo formerly diehard Windows users to Mac or Linux machines. Should be interesting.

The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs

I love fake blogs. Here's Steve Jobs' so-called diary:

What kind of country has an "ombudsman" anyway? Well, Norway does. And here he is. Bjoern Erik Thon. And he says if we don't "open up" iTunes, Norway will take us to court. Okay, Norway. You want to play hardball? Tell you what. Saddle up the reindeer, strap some body armor over your queer-ass Dale sweaters, wrap your pretentious scarf tight around your chicken neck, and meet us on the field of battle. Or how about this? How about we just stop selling iPods in Norway? And we block anyone in Norway from getting access to iTunes? And we tell everyone there that Bjoern Erik Thon is the reason for this, and here's his home address and phone number, so go see him if you don't like it. Or even better: How about I run for president of Norway, win in a landslide, fire Bjoern Erik Thon, and pass a law outlawing Microsoft and making Apple products the only ones allowed in Norway?

Now I need to find a fake Bill Gates blog where he raves about Vista...

Read more about Steve here...

In Praise of Science Fiction

You never know where you'll find someone praising Science Fiction, but here's a little gem from, of all places, the Huffinton Post blog:

The first step to enjoying science fiction is - well, the first step is getting used to the worst writing on earth -- but the second step to enjoying science fiction is getting past the titles.

And it's worth doing. Because we're living in a science fiction world.

We should have seen China's anti-satellite program coming, but the only venue where it was being discussed was You Only Live Twice.

There was this boring movie where this sonorous blowhard said the ice caps were melting, but it was called Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea, so no one paid any attention.

What if a cowardly dickweed with a messiah complex got to be President and started World War Three? Don't say The Dead Zone didn't warn you.

In On Her Majesty's Secret Service, Q is experimenting with radioactive lint. Now spies are running around London, killing each other with teeny tiny polonium specks.

I could go on, but I'm late for the convention and my mom's still sewing my costume.

And this isn't about me, anyway. This is about you. Snooty.

Battlestar Galactica is the best show on television, but you're not watching it just because it has robots in it. Yet you'll still watch Desperate Housewives. Like Nicollette Sheridan isn't more machine than man.

LOL!

Read more...

No time to blog!

I can’t get two seconds (okay, it takes longer than that) to myself to blog, it seems. I didn’t get to blog about:

• James Brown’s death (I should’ve gone to the viewing at the Apollo. I’ve never been there).


• President Ford’s death (It’s amazing how once someone has passed away, everyone has nice things to say. He could’ve used some of that while he was in office. He was always portrayed as a buffoon).


• The first baby born in NYC was born to an illegal immigrant (Toys R Us at first tried to back out of giving the baby the promised $25,000. Talk about bad publicity).


• It’s really, really freaking warm for January (I prefer that to the single digits we got a few years ago, but we know this is bad, right?)


• Orlando is nine months old! (I have tons of pictures to post on his site. Sigh).


• My cousin is visiting from Panama (and I think she’s really bored, but we’re trying).


• My dog took a flying leap off the top of the stairs (What the hell was he thinking?? He didn’t get hurt, but that was very scary).


• Nancy Pelosi (I don’t care what anyone says, she looks like a nice lady. Why does she scare people? I’d vote for her).


• My mom almost burned down the apartment (She left food on the stove, then went to the supermarket. Thank God nothing actually caught fire, but the place still smells of smoke).


• Randy Johnson is finally gone. (Yay!)

Belated Happy New Year, all.

Baby is sent through X-ray machine at LAX

From LATimes.com:

A woman going through security at Los Angeles International Airport put her month-old grandson into a plastic bin intended for carry-on items and slid it into an X-ray machine.

The early Saturday accident — bizarre but not unprecedented — caught airport workers by surprise, even though the security line was not busy at the time, officials said.

A screener watching the machine's monitor immediately noticed the outline of a baby and pulled the bin backward on the conveyor belt.

The infant was taken to Centinela Hospital, where doctors determined that he had not received a dangerous dose of radiation.

Lovely. Talk about having a "senior moment"!

Read more...

Man hits "tasty" seven-legged deer in his driveway

From Fond du Lac, Wisc. Reporter:

What has seven legs, male and female reproductive organs and nub antlers?

It sounds like a bad joke, but it's what Rick Lisko found in his driveway late last month.

Lisko hit the seven-legged nub buck while driving his truck through the woods along his mile-long driveway near Mud Lake, east of Waucousta in the Fond du Lac County town of Osceola on Nov. 22.

"It was definitely a freak of nature," Lisko said. "I guess it's a real rarity."

"And by the way, I did eat it," Lisko said. "It was tasty."

Ewww!!!

Read more..

Israeli Army Hates D&D

From Wired.com:

The fact of the matter is that when you're an Israeli soldier pinned down in a trench by Lebanese snipers, you really don't want to see your commander pull out his D20s and making his agility roll for dodge. That's not a Beholder you're facing there, Sarge.

The Israeli Army knows this. And that's why every D&D enthusiast who joins the Israeli army is automatically given a low security clearance and viewed as unrealiable, subpar soldiers.

Israeli officials view a fondness for Dungeons and Dragons as being indicative of a delusional mind, RPGers are out of touch with reality. "The game indicates a weak personality," one security official said. "One of the tests we do, either by asking soldiers directly or through information provided us, is to ask whether they take part in the game," he added. "If a soldier answers in the affirmative, he is sent to a professional for an evaluation, usually a psychologist." Also, a strip club.

ROFL! If the U.S. Army didn't let in Roleplayers, video gamers and comic book enthusiasts, let me tell you, they'd have no one. ;)

Actually, in the original article, the real beef wasn't with D&D, it was with Live Action Role Playing (LARP), but it's still funny.

Read more...

Investment Spam

More lovely spam. This is a great investment opportunity for hemp and cotton in Spain. Please!

Hemp & Cotton Company Ltd.

Dear possible representative,


This is hemp & Cotton Company Ltd. We collect hemp and cotton from Spain for production of textile and fabrics which we supply to our clients in the North American geographical region (United States) and Canada for cloth making.

Now are looking for some representatives over there who can help us receive payments from our customers. This wouldnt affect your present state of work though we are working on setting up some branches over there but for now we need someone who will be handling that aspect, We need people that are responsible and reliable.

Our main factory is located in London, United Kingdom where the hemp and cotton is needed for the manufacturing of fabrics, We are willing to pay $200 for any payment you receive and you can still keep your regular job while you work for us. All you will do is to receive payments from our customers over there.

To facilitate the conclusion of this transaction if accepted, do send us by mail promptly the following:

1.Your full name and full contact address.
2.Private phone number and email address.
3.Date Of Birth
4.What do you do for living presently?


ATTENTION: It wouldnt cost you any cent, you are to receive payments which will be sent to you from our business partners.

Please if you are interested please email us back to: betty.sales.manager@hotmail.com


Thanks for your time
Yours Sincerely,

Betty Wilson
Executive Manager


Contact Us Hemp and Cotton Ltd 2006 All rights reserved

Do legitimate businesses use Hotmail addresses to contact you? Didn't think so.

Stock Spam

I've been getting a lot of stock spam this fall. I hate that shit. Who would be ass enough to buy this stock? It's worth a fraction of a penny!

Andy Pettitte is headed back to the New York Yankees!

From Excite Sports News:

NEW YORK (AP) -Andy Pettitte is headed back to the New York Yankees.

Pettitte and the Yankees reached a preliminary agreement Friday on a $16 million, one-year contract, a deal that reunites the two-time All-Star with the team he helped to win four World Series titles.

Yay!!!! We should never have let Andy go in the first place!

Read more...

iPod Baby Onesie

That isn't my baby, that's someone else's baby, but how cool is that? An iPod onesie from iPodMyBaby.com!

I have to have it!







Also cute is iPodMyPhoto, but you ought to be able to do this yourself in Photoshop if you have patience. Or if you have a friend who has patience. ;) You submit your photo to them and they transform it into the look of an iPod ad for $19.95.

Search Continues for James Kim

From ABC News:

After being stranded in the wilderness for more than a week, three members of a California family are doing remarkably well.

Kati Kim, her 4-year-old daughter, Penelope, and her 7-month-old daughter, Sabine, should soon be released from Three Rivers Hospital in Grants Pass, Ore.

But their ordeal isn't over. A search continues for Kati's husband, James Kim, who left his family two days ago to look for help.

On Monday afternoon, rescuers found three members of the Kim family on a rugged, snow-filled road where their Saab station wagon had been stuck for more than a week.

This story is very troubling. I remember James Kim from the technology reports he used to do on Tech TV (before they became G4 TV and started catering solely to teen video gamers). He used to go on and on about his wife and kids in a very mushy way that was a bit much, but seemed genuinely sincere. You’d think that someone so into his family would’ve been more careful about driving in unfamiliar territory (regardless of who was actually driving).

It’s also very sobering to think that there are still places where you can’t get cell phone coverage and if you get lost, you might not be found in time. The only good part of the story is that the mom was able to keep the two girls alive by breastfeeding them, though if it hadn’t have been for the 7-month-old, you’d have to assume the mom wouldn’t have been lactating and the 4-year-old might not have made it.

Read more...

"Tweener" Involved in Fatal Accident

From TMZ.com:

Law enforcement sources from the Beverly Hills Police Department tell TMZ "Prison Break" star Lane Garrison was behind the wheel when his SUV crashed into a tree, killing one of the occupants.The accident occurred Saturday night in Beverly Hills. Sources say one of the passengers, a 15-year-old girl, was in critical condition and has a relative who works for the city of Beverly Hills. One source says the 17-year-old boy who was killed went to the local high school which is presumably Beverly Hills High.

We're told Garrison was not arrested or booked after the accident. Typically, after a "K" car crash injury -- police jargon when someone is killed -- cops will ask the driver to submit to a voluntary blood-alcohol test.

Read more...

The Autograph Man

There's a funny article on Slate.com about a pitcher who's catching up on his fan mail this off-season -- 15 years late. The author of the article is one of many people who contacted the pitcher, Don Carman, when he was a little kid and was surprised to hear from him so long after the fact.

As it turns out, I am not Carman's only recent correspondent. In October, a Philadelphia TV station reported that Doug Ferraro, 23, received an autographed card from Carman in response to a letter that he had mailed out 16 years before. This was now a legitimate mystery, so I called Carman in Florida to find out what happened.

"My wife told me it was time to clean the garage," Carman said. "So, I started digging through the stuff and found a box behind my tools. I opened it up and saw it was a bunch of fan mail, 200 to 250 letters." For Carman, this was a slight embarrassment. During his career, Carman had worked diligently to sign and return every one of the two or three letters he received each day. Judging from the date of Ferraro's card and the price of my stamp, he must have gotten our batch of letters some time in 1991, the year he left the Phillies for the Cincinnati Reds. "That year was the year I moved; I got a different house," he said. "I even remember putting them in the box, because it was unusual for me to do that. I thought I'd watch a football game and leisurely do them. It never got done."

Carman could hardly bear to throw the letters away. But at age 47, he didn't have the enthusiasm to pick through them, either. So he paid his son Jackson, who is 8 years old, $4 to open and sort them. Then they sat down together, with Jackson, who never saw his father play, marveling at the rapturous odes inside. ("Dear Mr. Carman: You are my favorite baseball player. … ") At first content with merely signing the cards, Carman got caught up in the spirit and started writing notes to the now-grown kids. He lugged the envelopes down to the Naples post office, where he discovered that most of them included 25-cent stamps. "I told the postman I needed 250 10-cent stamps, and 250 4-cent stamps, and he just looked at me like, 'What are you doing?' "

Read more...

X-Men illustrator dies in Superman pajamas

From CNN.com:

COLUMBIA, South Carolina (AP) -- Wearing Superman pajamas and covered with his Batman blanket, comic book illustrator Dave Cockrum died Sunday.

The 63-year-old overhauled the X-Men comic and helped popularize the relatively obscure Marvel Comics in the 1970s. He helped turn the title into a publishing sensation and major film franchise.

Cockrum died in his favorite chair at his home in Belton, South Carolina, after a long battle with diabetes and related complications, his wife Paty Cockrum said Tuesday.

At Cockrum's request, there will be no public services and his body will be cremated, according to Cox Funeral Home. His ashes will be spread on his property. A family friend said he will be cremated in a Green Lantern shirt.

At Marvel Comics, Cockrum and writer Len Wein were handed the X-Men. The comic had been created in 1963 as a group of young outcasts enrolled in an academy for mutants. The premise had failed to capture fans.

Cockrum and Wein added their own heroes to the comic and published "Giant-Size X-Men No. 1" in 1975. Many signature characters Cockrum designed and co-created -- such as Storm, Mystique, Nightcrawler and Colossus -- went on to become part of the "X-Men" films starring Hugh Jackman and Halle Berry.

Cockrum received no movie royalties, said family friend Clifford Meth, who organized efforts to help Cockrum and his family during his protracted medical care.

I didn't really like his artwork, but definitely not the way one wants to go out.

Read more...

Igawa's rights go to Yankees

From MLB.com:

NEW YORK -- After missing out on star Japanese pitcher Daisuke Matsuzaka earlier this month, the Yankees made sure not to let history repeat itself when Kei Igawa became available via the posting system.

Major League Baseball announced on Tuesday night that the Yankees had won the rights to the Japanese left-hander, who has pitched the past eight seasons for the Hanshin Tigers.

Published reports put the winning bid between $25-$26 million, which is roughly half of the $51.1 million it cost the Red Sox to acquire the rights to Matsuzaka. The Yankees would only pay Hanshin if they sign Igawa to a contract.

Hmm. This guy was not even on anyone's radar when the post season ended. It was all about Matsuzaka. I hope he's decent. At least he's a lefty and he's cheaper than Matsuzaka. It should be fun when the two go up against each other.

Read more...

Pelosi passes Hastings for Intel chair

From Yahoo News:

WASHINGTON - In a decision that could roil Democratic unity in the new House, Speaker-to-be Nancy Pelosi passed over Rep. Alcee Hastings (news, bio, voting record) Tuesday for the chairmanship of the Intelligence Committee.

Critics pointed out that he had been impeached when he was a federal judge and said naming him to such a sensitive post would be a mistake just as the Democrats take over House control pledging reforms.

"I am obviously disappointed with this decision," Hastings, D-Fla., said in a statement thanking his supporters. "I will be seeking better and bigger opportunities in a Democratic Congress."

He learned his bid for the chairmanship was unsuccessful during a closed-door meeting with Pelosi on Tuesday.

In a statement, Pelosi, D-Calif., said Hastings has made national security his highest priority. "He has served our country well, and I have full confidence that he will continue to do so," she said.

In a sign of the bitterness that has surrounded the debate, Hastings closed his statement by saying: "Sorry, haters, God is not finished with me yet."

Wait a minute. He actually used the word "haters" in a formal statement? I think this shows exactly why passing him by was a great idea. Sheesh.

Read more...

I Hate Verizon. And Linksys.

I've been having a lot of problems with my Verizon DSL service since Spring. It got to the point about two months ago where I was forced to reboot the modem/wireless gateway every time I logged on just to ensure a connection that would last 10 minutes without dropping. Not since the days of dial-up have I had service so piss-poor. I'm not talking about just turning off the modem by shutting off the power or hitting the reset button, mind you. That doesn't do squat. I had to connect to the modem through its web interface and disconnect it then reconnect. Unbelievable.

Finally, I'd had enough. I called Verizon and purchased a new plain Jane DSL modem for $35. Then I went to J&R and bought a Linksys Wireless-G broadband router with "SRX speed and range eXpansion" for $80.

You know what?

My connectivity is worse than it was before!

WTF!

Half the time I can't even see my own router in the list of available networks! As I'm typing this I'm connected to the Internet through somebody else's router! Whoever owns the router named "Sonia," thanks, man. At least your shit works. If it wasn't for you I'd have no wireless Internet whatsoever.

A Wii Workout: When Videogames Hurt

From the Wall Street Journal:

A videogame maker has finally succeeded in getting kids off the couch and moving around. But the new approach is turning out to be more exercise than some players bargained for.

These surprisingly vigorous workouts are being triggered by Nintendo's new Wii videogames. The Wii game console, which went on sale last weekend, competes with Microsoft's Xbox 360 and Sony's new PlayStation 3. One of the Wii's distinguishing features is a motion-sensitive technology that requires players to act out their character's movements, wielding the game's controller like a sword or swinging it like a tennis racket.

The new console has been wildly successful, selling out at stores and winning high marks from critics and game buffs. But as players spend more time with the Wii, some are noticing that hours waving the game's controller around can add up to fairly intense exertion -- resulting in aches and pains common in more familiar forms of exercise. They're reporting aching backs, sore shoulders -- even something some have dubbed "Wii elbow."

"It's harder than playing basketball," says Kaitlin Franke, a 12-year-old from Louisville, Ky. She has been camped out in front of her family's TV, fine-tuning her bowling motion and practicing boxing footwork in two of the Wii's games. Almost immediately, she says, her right arm started to feel numb.

In Rochester, Minn., Jeremy Scherer and his wife spent three hours playing tennis and bowling, two of the games included with the Wii. Mr. Scherer says he managed to improve his scores -- at the cost of shoulders and back that were still aching the next day. "I was using muscles I hadn't used in a while," says Mr. Scherer, a computer programmer who describes himself as "not very active." Mr. Scherer is vowing nightly "Wii workouts" to get in better shape.

ROFL! I wonder if the sales will drop once word gets out how physically demanding the games are? Moreover, I wonder when the first lawsuits for Wii-related injuries will hit?

Read more...

Police Kill Man After a Queens Bachelor Party

From the New York Times:

Hours before he was to be married, a man leaving his bachelor party at a strip club in Queens that was under police surveillance was shot and killed early yesterday in a hail of police bullets, witnesses and the police said. Two of his friends were wounded, one critically, they said.

Witnesses told of chaos, screams and a barrage of gunfire near Club Kalua at 143-08 94th Avenue in Jamaica about 4:15 a.m. after Mr. Bell and his friends walked out and got into their car. Mr. Bell drove the car half a block, turned a corner and struck a black unmarked police minivan bearing several plainclothes officers.

Mr. Bell’s car then backed up onto a sidewalk, hit a storefront’s rolled-down protective gate and nearly struck an undercover officer before shooting forward and slamming into the police van again, the police said.

In response, five police officers fired at least 50 rounds at the men’s car, a silver Nissan Altima; the bullets ripped into other cars and slammed through an apartment window near the shooting scene on Liverpool Street near 94th Avenue.

Mr. Bell — who was to have been wed at 5 p.m. yesterday to Nicole Paultre, 22, the mother of his two small daughters — was shot in the neck, shoulder and right arm and was taken to Jamaica Hospital Medical Center, where he was pronounced dead.

Wow. Kinda fucked up. On the surface some may see this as another Diallo case, but I don't see how these cops will be indicted. It looks like the groom was smashed out of his mind and unfortunately for him he hit the wrong car. Oh, and I'm sure the cops will say one or more of the guys in Bell's car had weapons and/or drugs. Yet another example of why you never, EVER let your friend drive drunk. Especially hours before his wedding.

Read more...

Richards tells Jackson racial slurs stemmed from humiliation

From CBC.ca:

Comedian Michael Richards, known best as Kramer on TV's Seinfeld, told Rev. Jesse Jackson's radio program that he recently yelled racial slurs at two black men out of anger, not prejudice.

Richards appeared on Jackson's nationally syndicated program, Keep Hope Alive, after the black leader invited him to appear.

The 57-year-old comic drew public fire after he hurled racial epithets at two hecklers who were ordering drinks during his act a week ago at a club in West Hollywood. His outburst was caught on a camera video and has since been posted on the internet.

The comic says he was trying to deal with hecklers at the time and was "in a place of humiliation" when he started using the racial epithets, which he claims he had never used before.

Richards' publicist Howard Rubenstein said the comedian would begin psychiatric counselling to learn how to deal with his anger and to comprehend how he ended up making those racist remarks.

Yo, didn't I say he'd end up in some kind of rehab? He's so full of shit.

Read more...

Family Day

As late as 7:20 a.m. on Friday I was having my doubts, but as Orlando drank his milk I looked at him and said, "Let's do this." Friday was "Family Day" at work and seeing as how they laid off 500 people a few weeks ago, they may never do this again. Or I may not be around if they do.

Within 40 minutes his diaper bag was packed and Orlando, me and my mom were in a cab and on our way. The cabbie was lousy and stubborn. He stopped for gas and refused to put on a seatbelt. Nevertheless, I was at my job by 8:45.

Orlando was great. He was very animated and social. He giggled when people were talking to him while I was taking him around and showing him off. He drank all his milk and he even had a long nap. The only bump in the road came when a former co-worker brought her baby to meet him. The other baby is three weeks younger, but taller, heavier and he can sit up on his own. The other baby also had a serious shoe fetish. He kept darting forward and touching Orlando's sneakers.

Orlando didn't know what to do. He looked at me, looked at the other baby, then he smiled tentatively. But the other baby kept doing it and Orlando looked like he was going to cry. I told him, "You live in New York, that's not the last time someone's going to try to take your clothes."

He looked at me blankly. ;)

Turkey Wrestling

Teeth!

Orlando's teeth are coming in!

Racist Rant By Seinfeld's Kramer

Pretty over the top, I'd say. He'll probably say he was drunk and he needs to go into rehab.

Soriano Gets Fifth-Richest Contract Ever

From ABC News.com

NEW YORK Nov 20, 2006 (AP)— Alfonso Soriano is thinking about a World Series title, something the Chicago Cubs have never brought to Wrigley Field.

Soriano's $136 million, eight-year contract was announced Monday by the Cubs after he passed a physical, the fifth-highest contract in baseball history and the first of eight years or more since Scott Rolen's deal with St. Louis in September 2002.

"It's a big contract, but that's not my goal," Soriano said. "My goal is to play hard and give you a championship for the city. That's my goal. It's not about the contract."

Chicago, which gave third baseman Aramis Ramirez a $75 million, five-year deal, hasn't won the World Series since 1908, when it played at the second West Side Park. In hopes of winning a championship, the Cubs are moving to the top level of baseball spenders, joining the New York Yankees and Boston Red Sox.

That's a lot of dough for a guy that strikes out a lot. The Cubs are in a very winnable division, however, so they should go for it. Now all they need are three more starting pitchers.

Read more...

My Favorite Podcasts

I moved up from an iPod Shuffle to a 30GB iPod video in August and I started really getting into podcasts. At first I listed to news and political commentary, but that quickly got boring and I moved on to sports and fiction.

During the baseball season I was really into ESPN Baseball Today. Their coverage was great through the regular season and through the conclusion of the World Series. I also listened to Steven A. Smith. I’m not sure if I like his style or not, but there’s something inherently creepy that hits you after you listen day in day out to sports guys trashing black and Hispanic men. It’s nice to hear at least one non-white guy give his opinion.

ESPN Podcasts

During the baseball season I was also listening to Without A Curse, a bi-weekly podcast by 13-year-old Red Sox fan, Alex Reimer. He’s not bad for a adolescent. He has a tendency to say “sucks” too often, and since he’s only 13 he has no sense of history (thing about it – in his lifetime the Braves and Indians have had more good seasons than bad), but, like I said, he’s not bad. He even manages to get adults who know a little something (like sports editors and the like) to appear on his show and do phone interviews. His show is weekly now that the season is over, but I’m still listening.

Why do I listen to a Red Sox show, you ask? Why, because it’s so fun to hear the suffering. You’d think they didn’t win that championship in 2004. More importantly, there’s no one doing a similar Yankees podcast. What’s up with that?

When I’m not listening to sports podcasts I listen to fiction podcasts. My favorite is Escape Pod, which gives me a weekly 30 to 50 minute sci-fi, fantasy or horror fix. Escape Pod tries to supply Hugo award winners or nominees to the listeners, so the quality of the stories is good. So far my favorite Escape Pod stories have been The King’s Tail and I Look Forward to Remembering You.

I also like the Union Dues stories, which fall into the superhero genre:

EP80: Cleanup In Aisle Five
EP62: Baby and the Bathwater
EP49: Off White Lies
EP27: Glass Jaw

Escape Pod has a sister show called Pseudopod which is dedicated to horror. My favorite Pseudopod stories have been Turista and Sacred Skin.

In the superhero genre I like How to Succeed in Evil, the story of an “Evil Efficiency Expert” who helps villains maximize their potential. Unfortunately, it’s been a month since an episode has come out, so they may have run out of steam.

Last but not least, I like Retrieval Detachment, which is a podcast that reviews other podcasts, but alas, they’ve disappeared since they’re doing NaNoWriMo. What I liked about the podcast was the freeform brainstorming of the two hosts as they analyze the themes of different stories – mostly Escape Pod stories. I liked their discussion of time travel as a business. They went way beyond the idea of guided tours to the past and came up with fun ideas like kidnapping Leonardo DaVinci to teach a special one day “Master Class” at a university. LOL!

PS3 Insanity

Sony’s PlayStation 3 went on sale at midnight on Friday. All over the country there were reports of people sleeping on sidewalks to be one of the first in line and people robbing the people who slept on the sidewalks (LOL!). And, of course, there’s the usual flurry of eBay activity whenever something is hot and the supplies are low.

I’ve seen a number of consoles offered up for $10k or so, only to go unsold, but here’s an auction that was actually completed. Somebody paid $15,000 for three consoles -- two 60GB and one 20 GB .

Maybe I’m the stupid one? Maybe next time one of these “must have” items comes out I should sleep on the concrete so I can get paid. When you think about it, that’s easy money.

But who are these people who are willing to pay ten times what the consoles are worth? Why do they do this when, if they just had a little patience, they could get the console five weeks from now for list price?

Beats me.

FDA OKs wide sales of silicone breast implants

From Yahoo News:

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Silicone breast implants will be widely available in the United States for the first time in 14 years after U.S. health officials approved sales by two companies on Friday.

Mentor Corp. (NYSE:MNT) and Allergan Inc. (NYSE:AGN) each must study the implant risks in 40,000 women for 10 years, the Food and Drug Administration said. Silicone breast implants were banned for most U.S. women in 1992 after some complained the devices leaked and made them chronically ill.

FDA officials said the companies had provided "reasonable assurance of the benefits and risks" that would enable women to make informed decisions.

"We now have a good understanding of what complications can occur and at what rates. We also know that women who get these devices will probably need to have additional breast implant surgery at least once," said Dr. Daniel Schultz, director of FDA's Center for Devices and Radiological Health.

Breast pain, hardening of the area around the implant, change in nipple sensation, implant rupture and the need for additional surgery all were reported in the companies' studies, the FDA said. Still, most women said they were happy with the implants.

You know, I understand that there are women out there who feel they need this because they don’t feel like women if they don’t have huge tits. Or they want to be actresses and they think they’ll get more jobs this way. But, MAN! The fucking side effects! So not worth it.

Read more…

Final Destination?

From Dailybulletin.com:

Last month, Bob Cartwright learned that his friend and personal pilot died in the plane crash that killed a New York Yankees pitcher.

"I was supposed to be on that plane," Cartwright told friends at the time. The pilot, Tyler Stanger, had invited Cartwright and Rod Watkins, a mutual friend, to a playoff game between the Yankees and the Detroit Tigers, but neither could make the trip.

Thirty-four days later, Cartwright got caught in a strange and sad twist of fate.

Cartwright died Tuesday at the age of 68 with two other men in a plane that crashed into the shoreline of Big Bear Lake, which is near his mountain home in nearby Sugarloaf.

Whoa. It's just like that movie.

Read more...

Red Sox Win Bidding Rights for Matsuzaka

Japan WBC team starter Daisuke Matsuzaka pitches against Japan's Yomiuri Giants in the first inning of their exhibition game at Tokyo Dome in Tokyo in this Wednesday, March 1, 2006 file photo.

From Yahoo News:

The Boston Red Sox have won the bidding battle for Japanese pitcher Daisuke Matsuzaka, national broadcaster NHK said Wednesday, Nov. 15, 2006. Matsuzaka's Seibu Lions accepted the Red Sox bid early Wednesday, NHK said citing the ball club. The pitcher now has 30 days to negotiate the contract. (AP Photo/Itsuo Inouye, File)

I'm totally cool with this. I did not want the Yankees to shell out big bucks for an unproven talent only to get burned again. Can you say Hideki Irabu? Jose Contreras? Hopefully he'll suck against MLB hitting.

Apple Teams Up With Six Airlines to Deliver iPod Integration

From Apple Hot News:

Apple is teaming up with Air France, Continental, Delta, Emirates, KLM and United to deliver the first seamless integration between iPod and in-flight entertainment systems. These six airlines will begin offering their passengers iPod seat connections which power and charge their iPods during flight and allow the video content on their iPods to be viewed on the their seat back displays.

Cool!

Read more…

Shea It Ain't So

From the Daily News:

For an estimated $20 million a year, banking giant Citigroup got a 20-year deal that will put its name on Citi Field, the 45,000-capacity ballpark now being built just east of the 42-year-old Shea Stadium.

But the main entrance, modeled on the one in Brooklyn's old Ebbets Field, will be called the Jackie Robinson Rotunda, it was announced at yesterday's gathering.

Okay, first of all, "Citi Field"? How long before they call it "Shitty Field"? I hate these corporate names for ball parks. How am I supposed to remember who plays where when the name of the team isn't even in the name of the park?

Second, that's a nice gesture for the memory of Jackie Robinson and all, but excuse me, he played for the Dodgers, right? Shouldn't they honor him? The Mets don't have a Met that they could honor?

Read more...

All Star Wars, All The Time

The evil bastards at Cinemax were showing all six Star Wars movies back to back to back to, well, you get the picture, all weekend. And they're gonna continue showing the movies in story order and release date order through December.

Mustn't... black... out... ARGGGH!

View schedule here.

Veterans Day

In case you didn't know, yes, I'm a veteran. I served 8 years in the Army Reserve and I was deployed to Guantanamo Bay, Cuba as part of operation Enduring Freedom.

Let's just say, it was very stressful.

Sheff Shipped to Motown

From the Daily News:

The Yankees fulfilled their first objective of the offseason by trading outfielder Gary Sheffield to the Tigers for three top pitching prospects, the Daily News has learned.

The three prospects are Bronx native Humberto Sanchez, relievers Kevin Whelan and Anthony Claggett.

I don't even care if these prospects don't pan out. Good riddance. I liked Sheff in 2004, but after that he started running his mouth. What an asshole. My only regret is that we didn't ship him off to an NL team so we'd never see his ass again.

Read more...

Virginia is for Lovers

A celebratory Democrat James Webb holds up his Marine Corps son's combat boots during an election victory rally in Arlington, Va. Photo by Bill O'Leary - The Washington Post

From The Washington Post:

Virginia Sen. George Allen (R) today conceded the election to Democrat James Webb, cementing Democratic control of the Senate.

As of this morning, Allen trailed Webb by 7,484 votes. Republican sources said Allen had concluded that no amount of recounting would change the outcome, but members of the senator's campaign staff would not publicly confirm his intentions.

The concession spared the country from a recount that could have left control of the U.S. Senate in limbo for weeks. And it makes official what many have been saying since late Wednesday: that Webb will become Virginia's junior senator, giving Democrats a 51-seat majority and complete control of Congress for the first time in more than a decade.

With the vote tally so close, Allen noted that he had the legal right to ask for a recount, a procedure he said could drag on until Christmas.

Yay! The misogynist beat the racist! Woo hoo! It's a great day.

Read more...

Election Aftermath

[Who thought it was a good idea to have an ass as a political party's mascot anyway?]

Did You?

You did vote today, didn't you?

U.S. is twentieth most corrupt nation on Earth

From CNN.com:

Berlin-based corruption watchdog Transparency International (TI) ranks 163 countries based on perceived levels of corruption among public officials and politicians in its 2006 Corruption Perceptions Index (CPI).

TI said several countries had a significant worsening of their ratings, including Brazil, Cuba, Israel, Jordan, Laos, Seychelles, Trinidad and Tobago, Tunisia and the United States.

"This survey suggests that corruption in Iraq is very bad," TI Chief Executive David Nussbaum told Reuters.

Nussbaum, noting the recent Enron trial, said U.S. court cases had highlighted the scale of corruption there and may have contributed to the deterioration in the U.S. score. The United States was ranked 20th, next to Belgium and Chile.

Wow, we really do stink.

Not only did the U.S. suck at the Winter Olympics, World Cup, World Baseball Classic and the World Basketball Championships this year (not to mention yesterday's New York Marathon), we’re not even capable of being number one at evil? What kind of shit is this? Where's the pride?

Let’s all go out and vote tomorrow. Be sure to pick the candidates most likely to do evil, so hopefully we’ll break into the upper echelons of corruption next year and blow away punk ass countries like Seychelles.

Thirteen Writing Prompts

Thinking about writing (even though I'm not trying to get anything done), I came across this list of writing prompts for a contest on mcsweeneys.net.

THIRTEEN WRITING PROMPTS

BY DAN WIENCEK

- - - -

1.

Write a scene showing a man and a woman arguing over the man's friendship with a former girlfriend. Do not mention the girlfriend, the man, the woman, or the argument.


2.

Write a short scene set at a lake, with trees and shit. Throw some birds in there, too.


3.

Choose your favorite historical figure and imagine if he/she had been led to greatness by the promptings of an invisible imp living behind his or her right ear. Write a story from the point of view of this creature. Where did it come from? What are its goals? Use research to make your story as accurate as possible.


4.

Write a story that ends with the following sentence: Debra brushed the sand from her blouse, took a last, wistful look at the now putrefying horse, and stepped into the hot-air balloon.


5.

A wasp called the tarantula hawk reproduces by paralyzing tarantulas and laying its eggs into their bodies. When the larvae hatch, they devour the still living spider from the inside out. Isn't that fucked up? Write a short story about how fucked up that is.


6.

Imagine if your favorite character from 19th-century fiction had been born without thumbs. Then write a short story about them winning the lottery.


7.

Write a story that begins with a man throwing handfuls of $100 bills from a speeding car, and ends with a young girl urinating into a tin bucket.


8.

A husband and wife are meeting in a restaurant to finalize the terms of their impending divorce. Write the scene from the point of view of a busboy snorting cocaine in the restroom.


9.

Think of the most important secret your best friend has ever entrusted you with. Write a story in which you reveal it to everyone. Write it again from the point of view of your friend. Does she want to kill you? How does she imagine doing it? Would she use a gun, or something crueler and more savage, like a baseball bat with nails in it?


10.

Popular music is often a good source of writing inspiration. Rewrite Bob Dylan's "Visions of Johanna" as a play.


11.

Write a short scene in which one character reduces another to uncontrollable sobs without touching him or speaking.


12.

Your main character finds a box of scorched human hair. Whose is it? How did it get there?


13.

A man has a terrifying dream in which he is being sawn in half. He wakes to find himself in the Indian Ocean, naked and clinging to a door; a hotel keycard is clenched in his teeth. Write what happens next.

I like prompt number 5 best. The contest winners are here.

==

Okay, here's runner-up number two who used prompt number 7:

A Day in the Life of R. Kelly.

By Jenny R. Thomas

- - - -

"See, girl? Those bills ain't nothin' to me, plenty more where that came from— No, no, not in the bucket; I got people to dry-clean the upholstery! Shit."

===

ROFL!

Dissing the Dead

From the New York Times:

Long-silent mistresses, disgruntled former employees, estranged family members — Katie Falzone has seen them all.

They turn to the online guest books at the obituary Web site where she works, Legacy.com, to convey unflattering thoughts about the recently departed.

It is Ms. Falzone’s job to stop them.

…

Legacy, which is now eight years old, carries a death notice or obituary for virtually all the roughly 2.4 million people who die each year, but few foresaw how nasty some of the postings to its guest books would be.

Some of the snubs are blunt. “Everyone gets their due,” a former client writes of an embezzling accountant. Or, “I sincerely hope the Lord has more mercy on him than he had on me during my years reporting to him at the Welfare Department.”

Others are subtler: “She never took the time to meet me, but I understand she was a wonderful grandmother to her other grandchildren.”

“Reading the obit, he sounds like he was a great father,” says another, which is signed, “His son Peter.”

I’d never heard of this site before. They even had an obit and a guestbook for Yankee pitcher Corey Lidle.

A fascinating article and a fascinating site.

Read more…

IE7 = The Devil’s Browser

If you’ve used Windows Update in the last few days you by now have been given the opportunity to download Internet Explorer 7. Internet Explorer 7 has all sorts of nifty features such as tabbed browser windows, plug-ins, a choice of search engines to use, themes and the ability to subscribe to RSS feeds.

This would be awesome, except for the fact that Firefox (AKA Mozilla) has had these features and more for fucking YEARS now. And shit prints nicer from Firefox too.

Oh my God, how weak can you get?

Technorati tags: IE7 | firefox | mozilla | internet explorer

Total Recall

Here's a nice picture of Orlando playing with a toy that could kill him.

Once again I've purchased a toy that could kill a child. I received an email today from the Consumer Product Safety Commission about one of Orlando's favorite toys:

RC2 Recalls Toy Keys Due to Choking Hazard

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission, in cooperation with the firm named below, today announced a voluntary recall of the following consumer product. Consumers should stop using recalled products immediately unless otherwise instructed.

Name of Product: Toy Keys

Units: About 275,000

Importer/Distributor: RC2 Brands Inc., of Oak Brook, Ill. The recalled products are marketed under RC2’s Learning Curve and The First Years brands.

Hazard: The colored top portion of the keys can crack, resulting in the release of small parts, which poses a choking hazard to young children.

Incidents/Injuries: RC2 has received four reports of cracking. No injuries have been reported.

Description: “Shake ‘n Jingle Keys,” “Shake & Jingle Keys,” “My Jingle Keys” all by The First Years and the John Deere “Real Keys” are toy keys, with three colored keys attached to a blue, red or green remote control with electronic features. Various colored buttons on the remote activate sounds. Only toy keys with the letter “F” in the date code stamp on the packaging and product are involved in the recall. The date code can be found on the back of the remote control. Toy keys with “TE” in the date code or yellow sides on the remote are not included in this recall.

Sold at: Department stores and independent toy stores nationwide from August 2005 through October 2006 for about $6.

Manufactured in: China

Remedy: Consumers should stop using the recalled toy keys immediately and contact RC2 for a free replacement toy.

Consumer Contact: For additional information, contact RC2 at (800) 704-8697 between 8 a.m. and 5 p.m. CT Monday through Friday, or visit the Learning Curve’s Web site at www.learningcurve.com

Earlier this year another toy (a toy cell phone) I'd purchased for one of my cousins also got recalled. Oh, and the batteries in my PowerBook G4 and Sony Vaio laptops were recalled too.

I think anything more complex than a large rubber ball is probably lethal and flawed.

Technorati tags: recall | baby | toys

NaNoWriMo… No. Again.

Well, it’s November and once again I’m not participating in NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). I mentioned back in February that I’d started this blog in 2005 in order to prepare for NaNoWriMo, but it still hasn’t happened. I don’t seem to have the ability to create anything new, so the only way I’m ever going to get a novel done is to piece together the stuff I scribbled down in pencil on loose-leaf paper when I was 14 years old. Somehow that feels like cheating, like I’m ripping off that younger, more creative self.

But, hey. That’s what old folks do -- feed off of the energy of the young.